I Want To Commit Suicide That Is Why I Want The Cyanide Pill (Page 5)

I want to commit suicide, that is why i want the cyanide pill.

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True. Glad you said that. People are suffering and God knows more than anyone what people go through. He hurts when we hurt. What matters most is that a person has accepted Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord and that we have a daily walk/relationship with him.

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Cheryl, how can suicide be the only way for you to go? And why would you kill yourself because your HUSBAND is mean? He's the problem, NOT YOU! You need to get angry and get the gumption to get yourself free. You matter and he has no right to take your God-given life away from you! There is always someone who will help, but you have to find it. Good luck!

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Suzisu,

Please choose HIM. He is the answer to all of our hurts. This world is going to pass away sooner or later. Despite being told by unbelievers things have remained the same, as the bible promises, things continue to grow more evil. However, what will replace this society is going to be awesomely better! Be there!

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But I don't believe in HIM. Never have and never will. There is no God as far as I'm concerned so how can he fix my problems?

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Hi SuziSu,

I understand fully what you are saying. It is still difficult for me to grasp how a person can be an atheist. I've only had two people in my entire life tell me to my face that they were atheists, a male co-worker and a female relative. Both had grown up in very dysfunctional families.

My honest feeling about it is this: If you do not believe in God and DO NOT want to know him, then you must make your life here "full" of activities. It's up to you. You must adopt the mindset that you must make things happen for yourself. By that, I mean you must then "seek out" things that give you some joy during the day, because when things go badly and you are depressed, you feel you have nothing else to hold onto. When depression hits, you look down the road and see nothing hopeful. When I get really depressed, I pray for God's help and still think about my future with God and that I will finally be totally happy and never cry again one day. The purpose in life for people with no hope for everlasting life is continual activities and goals to take up your time and keep your mind busy. Your focus then must be to get as much living out of this life as you can. If you waste time, it will really bring you down. An idle mind is the devil's playground for sure. You will overthink, and bad thoughts cloud your head, causing anger and moodiness.

I think a good thing for you would be to find people who have things in common with you. There are other caretakers in the world who are just waiting for a friend, and someone who understands. You can be that person. And you also need to see another person who is in a worse situation than yours. Because right now, you probably feel ungrateful about everything. If you're not holding onto God, then you have to find other things to hold onto.

Definitely, you need intimacy. You need a few close relationships with other people. You need to move your body, even though you have an illness. You need to get outside and have the sun in your face. When we are deal with depressing situations for too long, our lives become UNBALANCED. Too much negativity puts us out of kilter. We also need some entertainment and fun times to offset the pain and heartache.

Another great thing is to think of an interest or something you've wanted to try, and do it. It could be a hobby. There are people for everything you can think of.

I have loved animals all my life. Unfortunately, I am not able to have a pet because a relative owns our home. I am currently in a difficult situation, believe me. Had many depressing days and nights. My friends now are all in another state and I've been here only a year. I have decided to finally volunteer at a shelter and I also plan to pet sit in the near future. This will also bring me into contact with new people and doing something that gives me so much joy.

You have to sit down, meditate and open your mind to some alternatives.

However there is another issue that I have found with many people who say things like what others have said on this board. Example: "Nobody cares about me." Or something like, "Everybody takes advantage of me. I get used and abused again and again. People suck!"

Hurting people tend to be VERY self centered and they don't even realize it. They often have been hurt from a young age and the scars cause them to look out for their own needs first. They constantly try to protect themselves and often are not honest with friends. They go toward people thinking about what they can get from others or what someone SHOULD do for them, and then they are disappointed when other people pull away or do not want to be around them anymore. When people sense dishonesty and friendships feel unbalanced, they often go into the gutter.

I personally have cut off people like that after many years of putting up with their dishonesty, jealousy and antics. Finally, they do one more thing, and I've had it. I cut the friendships and they were very hurt. I did that long ago -- not anymore because I'm careful about choosing the right friends.

We have to feel good about ourselves, know our worth and have a purpose. I do not know how many atheists can really accomplish that. The one male co-worker I knew was loved by so many people, but he lived a very decent life. I see many atheists staying super busy and doing charity work, traveling a lot, socializing, etc. That is a way to make them feel good and enjoy life, I think. Knowing God and being obedient to his Word makes believers feel good about themselves. It also conquers low self-esteem. It's like how the bible says that if God is for you, who can be against you? You stop seeking human approval, because you know who you are. You become a better person inside, and then that tends to attract people to you.

I was always a loner. I don't like crowds. But since my young years, I have always tried to go toward goodness. I am convinced that good things bring good feelings. Whenever I behaved badly, I felt guilty and badly about myself. I have always been an independent thinker and carried somewhat different views. However, God has always given me a few dear friends, people I can trust. And we had an almost instant connection. I can go for years meeting all kinds of people I don't want to hang around with, and then, all of a sudden, a new person somehow comes into my picture and brings joy to my life.

I want to say while I'm still posting that in case there are others here who do not believe in God, but wish they could have faith, that all they need to do is humble themselves and start talking to God wherever they are, saying, "You know, I do not believe in you, but I want what you have if it is real. If there is a chance that what you're promising is going to come true, please reveal yourself to me and give me the faith that you desire me to have."

Mean it and believe it. It is that simple.

There are many things that believers keep hitting their heads over because struggling with our bodies is very difficult. People try again and again. Christians very often leave church and their entire faith because they feel they can't make themselves do the right things. They also feel like God's laws are too difficult, no fun, and that they don't want to follow his ways.

I say that when people struggle with their "flesh" or some other problem, they still need to give the problem to God. BEG him to take it away from you. Whatever it is that you're trying to do right, but can't quite do. Let him change you from the "inside." And do not later on tell others that YOU did it because you're so strong and religious. Give God his glory and witness about his awesome power.

SuziSu, I went off a bit because I know others will read this. I pray that you will find peace. And I don't know you, but I can still ask God to intercede in your life and circumstances.

Be well.

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help me, convince me

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iwant to die too. cant see any future , but dont want to get it wrong n end up in a worse state

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@ Gail -- what "exactly" has caused you to see no future for yourself? Depressing situation? Illness? Love life? Isolation? Have you sought any professional help yet?

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AMEN BROTHER I ALSO PRAY THAT EVERYONE IN HERE FINDS GOD, IF YOURE STILL HERE ON EARTH ALIVE ITS BECAUSE HE STILL HAS A PURPOSE FOR YOUR LIFE, WE ALL GO THROUGH ROUGH TIMES, BUT WE CAN'T DO IT IN OUR OWN STRENGTH WE NEED GOD'S STRENTGH TO DO EVERYTHING IN OUR LIVES, I BLESS EVERYBODY IN HERE IN THE NAME OF JESUS MAY HE TOUCH YOUR HEARTS WHEN YOU READ THESE WORDS, AMEN.

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AMEN SISTER IM SO GLAD YOU WROTE ALL OF THAT!!!! GOD IS ALIVE!!!!! I FEEL IDENTIFIED WITH YOUR TESTIMONY AND EVERYTHING YOU WROTE!!!!!

MAY GOD BLESS EVERYBODY'S LIVES IN HERE AND PRAISE THE LORD FOR HIS MERCY AND LOVE!!!!!

GOD IS THE ONLY SOLUTION

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Hi if u get it plz give me also..plzzzzz

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I have just had enouth o life and can no longer take any more

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I hate my life too. Does god come to save me?

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Is martin dead...

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pls tell me how to purchse from you - need 1 gram

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I am Jo of Ohio. Am only child and when we drove in a highway, we met an accident and my dearly mother died but I survived. I need a quick death. My anger is so heavy so I need to die.

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I find it amazing how so many religious freaks find their way to boards mentioning suicide. Have you contemplated suicide? Or let me guess...... god sent you here? Yea, OK, if you say so.......

Here is a thought for you christian freaks, have you ever stopped to think that maybe suicide is god's way of calling you home?

I'll take that cyanide pill now.....

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I don't blame you for feeling that way....have you thought about going to Oregon for euthanasia....I heard that is good.

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Can anyone tell me where I can find cyanide pills please?

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Where can I find cyanide pills please?

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