Citalopram Has Ruined My Marriage (Page 4)

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A while a ago my daughter was being bullied at school, which drove her to take an overdose, thank fully she was ok and is doing fine now. But my wife took it really hard and started to suffer with anxiety so the doctor gave her citalopram. Instantly I noticed a change in her attitude, she just turned so hard faced and cold toward me, then what was a healthy sexual relationship turned to a relationship with no sex at all, I've tried to tell her that this drug has changed her but she is not interested, this drug had changed her from being a normal loving mother/wife to a woman who needs no love or affection. And now after 15yrs of being together she wants a divorce, to sell the house and go our separate ways, I am absolutely devastated I can't imagine my life without this woman I have loved for so long, but it's the medication im dealing with not my wife, she's in there some where but I can't and don't know how to bring her back. I love my wife and would do anything to keep her and not get divorced but it all seems to be falling on deaf ears. Is there anyone out there who knows what I can do? I am heartbroken and don't want to leave her in this state but she is adamant that we split immediately.

76 Replies (4 Pages)

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61

I've just read through Peter R. Breggin, MD where he clearly describes how Celexa destroys marriages. He throughly states the stages and how this happens but the people don't realize it's the drug. Highly recommend his book medication madness. He is a Harvard trained Dr. In practice for 4 decades.

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62

Can anything be done to reserve this medication? I'm still very much in love with my husband and want him back. Our son is very distraught over this as well he doesn't understand why his daddy doesn't want to be at home I'm very desperate.....

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63

After a few months on Escitalopram my husband changed so much I cant recognise him.We separated.I informed his doctor, GP about changes and mentioned that the family should be informed when this medication is prescribed and that psychiatric help should be considered. She was surprised about severity of side effects but did not promise anything, no potential evaluation, no consultation with my husband, possibility of other drugs, options... such a grey area, as spouses want to help but GPs have to remain confidential... feeling hopeless and disapointed..this medication changed our world and the family is devastated..

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64

So very sorry to read of your situation. Please get Peter R Breggin MD book Medication Madness. You read it then give to your husband to read. This is a common problem with this medication.
Good luck. Mari

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65

My husband has been taking citalopram for anxiety issues for three years now. He has no empathy anymore. He directs his anger to people and stuff outside our domestic sphere. But he does not really listen to me anymore. He makes light of me and my feelings. I feel like I am banging my head against a granite wall. Intimacy is different now too, but that is the least of it really. He just seems to be hard and lacking in empathy. And it really hurts because I totally love him.

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66

My girlfriend of two years started taking citalopram and it seemed like she experienced some significant personality changes around that time. She became impatient, irritable and started expressing hostility towards me regularly. She wasn't goofy or playful like she used to be and seemed like she was always upset at me. It was causing me a lot of stress because I felt like she was always angry at me, and anything I tried to say would make it worse. Finally, I decided I would not walk on eggshells but would rather be honest about my needs and boundaries, and this led to her losing it and hanging up the phone on me after which I decided to break it off and go no contact. For me there was a noticeable change from someone who was goofy, silly, playful and able to be an adult when it mattered, to someone who was impatient, easily irritated, angry, and apathetic, maybe anhedonic. I never said anything about the fact that I thought it may have been the antidepressant because I was afraid she would have accused me of being judgmental for whatever I said. The change was sudden and drastic, and as much as I loved her and wanted to be with her and possibly raise a family, it was not worth putting up with abuse. After this experience, I will not date anyone using this medication or any similar because of the stability issues. I myself have worked through trauma, and took citalopram for a time for depression, but not for long and only half the recommended dosage. It was much more beneficial for me to explore and release the emotions organically with support of others. I think most people opt for medicating because they aren't willing or able to dedicate the time and energy to organic healing. I was fortunate in my case. I wish her the best but I can't be close to her anymore.

I found this by googling "citalopram and breakups" because I was suspicious the cit played a role and found this thread. I identify with so much and would be interested to read Dr. Breggin's book.

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67

I am on the other side and can relate fully. I stopped caring about anything.

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68

Hi, im feeling the same thing is about to happen to me, my wife has changed so much im worried to death. Is there any advice out there.

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69

Does she recognize the change in her? If not then I would suggest you bring your best, kindest conversational skills and explain in detail the changes you see in her. Be specific. I believe this drug can change personality and alter the mind. You don't give much information as to time on drug, reasons she was put on it etc. I also ask, did she or you or both ever explore why and what life events brought on the symptoms she is seeking relief from a pill? And were other steps taken to try and improve her life/situation before starting meds? Finally, she may be having an adverse reaction as you stated you are concerned. She might no realize adverse effects may be happening to her including her thought process and emotional blunting.

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70

She went on it after our second child just for anxiety, been on them around 8 months now, i dont think she believes its the drug but im nearly getting her to possibly believe it. I dont think she needs this drug for anxiety and theres no way she could just become the way she is weve been together since we were kids. She wants space to clear her mind which i have given her i dont know if thats a good idea or bad idea.

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71

Well usually people are told they can go on it for a period of time and come off. Be very careful to taper off by reducing dosage over time. You need to know as does she this drug can alter brain architecture. Specifically by neurogenics. You may have been happy with how things were going but maybe she wasn't and didn't know exactly what was wrong or possibly how to express it. If you want to support her suggest she come off the drug with Dr.s help and then examine your life together and make plans on how to improve it. Maybe go to marriage counseling to help each of you to express wants and needs in a constructive manner to each other. Understand for many these drugs can be addictive. The drug companies would like nothing better. People grow and change and needs become different during ones life time. Clearly she was becoming anxious over something so as her life partner you must make an effort to understand and help her. It may not, probably won't be easy. But what is the alternative?

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72

Morning this is the first time that i have ever used a blog like this to understand the situation that i am in.... i am a male, Husband with 2 amazing children and what use to be a very loving and caring wife. (I will explain)

My wife was this amazing loving and caring person i have ever meet and we were so happy. After the birth of our second child see started getting panic attacks, unable to leave the house, crying and hot flushes.... i tried to be supportive to her but with very little understanding on mental health its difficult.

She went to a her Doctor and she was given 20 MG of Citalopram i don't like the idea of antidepressants but i was willing to let her short term to cope with what ever was going on with her..

This worked really well sex was amazing, she was intermit with me and we could not keep our hands off each other. then she started to feel sick and the attacks happened again so the doctor increased the dose to 30 Mg (This is when it started to go wrong even thou at the time i did not know this) 4 months later she can't stand the sight of me, does not want to engage in cuddles kisses or any sign of affection.

All our friends called us the happiest couple that they have ever known and love the fact that we always did fun and exciting things together.

I asked her when she started feeling like this and it was around the time that her does was increased, she is completely emotionless when it comes to me.
I know that some people will think that i may have to face the fact that she does not love me any more, but there is no way we go from being the happiest couple to out of love to the point she really does not care about me in 4 months (At the same time the dose was increased)

Family members have said that see looks like she is in a gaze like she is there but know one at home.

She wants to leave me now and have said that see loves me but don't want to touch me or any thing... the problem is is that she can't see that its the drug that is numbing her and in like so many stories i have read it will be to late..

This drug is horrible she was meant to be on it for 6 months and its now nearly 3 years doctors need to take control of this...

13 years of a relationship is to fall victim to this horrible drug

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73

citalopram is about to destroy 13 years of happy marriage

Morning this is the first time that i have ever used a blog like this to understand the situation that i am in.... i am a male, Husband with 2 amazing children and what use to be a very loving and caring wife. (I will explain)

My wife was this amazing loving and caring person i have ever meet and we were so happy. After the birth of our second child see started getting panic attacks, unable to leave the house, crying and hot flushes.... i tried to be supportive to her but with very little understanding on mental health its difficult.

She went to a her Doctor and she was given 20 MG of Citalopram i don't like the idea of antidepressants but i was willing to let her short term to cope with what ever was going on with her..

This worked really well sex was amazing, she was intermit with me and we could not keep our hands off each other. then she started to feel sick and the attacks happened again so the doctor increased the dose to 30 Mg (This is when it started to go wrong even thou at the time i did not know this) 4 months later she can't stand the sight of me, does not want to engage in cuddles kisses or any sign of affection.

All our friends called us the happiest couple that they have ever known and love the fact that we always did fun and exciting things together.

I asked her when she started feeling like this and it was around the time that her does was increased, she is completely emotionless when it comes to me.
I know that some people will think that i may have to face the fact that she does not love me any more, but there is no way we go from being the happiest couple to out of love to the point she really does not care about me in 4 months (At the same time the dose was increased)

Family members have said that see looks like she is in a gaze like she is there but know one at home.

She wants to leave me now and have said that see loves me but don't want to touch me or any thing... the problem is is that she can't see that its the drug that is numbing her and in like so many stories i have read it will be to late..

This drug is horrible she was meant to be on it for 6 months and its now nearly 3 years doctors need to take control of this...

13 years of a relationship is to fall victim to this horrible drug

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74

I have been with my husband for 17 years, married 18 months. My father-in-law passed away suddenly and I encouraged my to see a doctor and he was put on Citalopram. 2 years he has been on them and we have our arguments, like all couples but he has now said he doesn't love me and showing no emotion al all! Having read this forum, it has made me realise that the arguments we have had have been increased since he has been on this medication.

I am distraught, I love my husband more then anything, he is my sole mate! I don't know what to do. Its 5 weeks till xmas and he wants to separate! Our 13 year old daughter is so upset, but this isn't making a difference. Intimacy has been none existent since being on these tablets and I have not pressured him. This drug needs to be reevaluated as it is messing with peoples families. I am sure there are other medication that can help.

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75

I am so sorry you are going through this. I am in exactly the same situation. I am 44 and have been with my husband since I was 16. He has change so much and I actually had a mental breakdown myself. I have explained that it’s almost worse than death because there is no closure. I see my husband in the flesh but he isn’t my husband anymore. I couldn’t bear to leave him so I just live with its but honestly it’s killing me.

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76

My name is Jeff. It ruined my life. I was on it 20 yrs. It caused my heart to swell & I had total heart failure. It also caused my divorce. I am a Christian man & have now remarried. Wish I could communicate with you & your wife & tell u what this drug will do.

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